7 Ways On How To Deal With An Angry Disrespectful Child

In this article we are going to be reviewing how to deal with an angry disrespectful child and what you can try to resolve your situation.

 

Parents try to do the best for their children. They provide them love, support, and guidance. They can model polite and respectful behavior. Even the best parents can find themselves struggling at times. Children can be disrespectful at times. They can have anger issues especially as they grow up.

 

When a child approaches their teen years they can develop such an attitude. It seems that it is okay for young people to be disrespectful to adults and to each other. If a parent has a child with an attitude there is help for them.

 

These are 7 ways to deal with an angry and disrespectful child. It is possible to turn the behavior around and get them to get over the attitude.

Reasons for the Disrespect

Disrespect can come in different forms. It can include cursing, yelling, and arguing. The child can refuse to listen to the parent or they can outright ignore them.

 

There are some things that the parent then needs to be aware of. This behavior is telling the parent they need to take back control and set more rules or limits.

 

Disrespect does not just happen overnight. It takes time and before a parent knows what is going on the child is rude.

 

Changing the behavior is not going to happen overnight either. It will be a process but it is important to stay with it.

Disrespect can be a normal part of development especially when the hits the adolescent years. This is a way the child is showing that they are becoming an individual and that they are becoming separate from the parents. While it is a hard thing to do this is where some of the anger is coming from. It is easier for a kid to be rude but that does not mean the behavior has to be tolerated.

Disrespectful children often lack problem solving skills. They do not know how to handle things properly so they become angry. This is the way they have of coping. It is up to the parent to give their child the skills needed to work on these problems. These are some ways to deal with a child that is being disrespectful.

1. Ignoring Attention Seeking Behavior

While parents may not think it is a good idea to ignore the disrespectful behavior and allow the child to go on without a consequence sometimes they will learn from this.

 

If the child is looking for a response from the parent and is not getting it the behavior is not fulfilling its purpose. If the child is told to do something and they complain, don’t just yell at them. Tell them the consequences if they do not follow directions and leave it at that.

 

Some natural consequences will happen if the child is rude or angry. If they are being disrespectful to other children they will not have friends.

 

A parent cannot protect their child from everything and sometimes they need to learn the hard way. Later when everyone is calm the parent can then talk about the behavior and why it will not get them far. They can also think of other ways to handle frustrations.

2. Do Not Take it to Heart

While a parent may think that their child hates them or they did something wrong if they are disrespectful the parents should not take it to heart.

 

Children look for ways to express themselves as they become their own person. As the adult, you should not feel angry and express anger back.

 

When speaking to your child you need to be direct and to the point with your message. If your child does need a consequence you needs to tell them directly and enforce it immediately. As a parent, you need to think about what they want your child to learn from this experience. You are not always going to be liked and that is okay.

 

Parenting is not always easy and you are going to make your kid mad especially when limits are set. Remember, you are not a friend. You are a caregiver, protector, and a teacher. You need to lead your child and make sure they act properly so they can become functioning adults.

3. Avoid a Power Struggle

When you and your child get into a power struggle any lesson is over. At times it can be hard. When they yell or curse at you they want to you to say something back.

 

This goes back to not taking things personally. As a parent you need to teach then proper behavior. If they respond in the same behavior then your child is not learning anything.

 

The child may be trying to engage their parent in a fight. It is important to avoid this. A parent should have a plan on what they are going to do when their child becomes disrespectful. They should stick to this plan and not get into a screaming match with the child.

 

The goal of this is to show the child there are different and more productive ways to respond when angry or upset. If the child is going to scream and yell every time they get made they will not be able to live independently.

 

When they are yelling it is important for the parent to remain calm and collected. If the child is looking for attention and they do not get it the behavior should stop.

4. Give One Warning

Parents should not have to remind the child that there will be consequences for the actions. Simply give one warning that the behavior needs to stop and that is it.

 

At that time they do not have to say anything else to the child. You don’t even have to tell the child what they are doing wrong.

 

Most children can tell that they are being rude and disrespectful. They know what is happening and they know that it is not okay. At this time they may be angry and not care.

 

Children know the rules and they know what is right and wrong. They know when they are breaking these rules. A parent should say one thing and then talk about it with the child later.

 

When they are not getting the parent to fight back they will not be engaging in this behavior. When everyone is calm then the parent can talk to the child.

5. Consequences

All consequences should be immediate and should follow the behavior. A parent will need to consider the age of the child and the action that happens.

 

The consequence should be done to correct the behavior. Since a rule was broken the parents are going to need to do something about it and this is in the form of the consequences.

 

The punishment needs to be logical and fit the offense. Young children can have a calm down corner. For example, if the child was told to get off the phone and they did not then the phone is taking away.

 

If the child talks back they need to learn to apologize and stop this in the future. A younger child can be given time in a calming corner.

 

They can go in this corner and the parent can talk to them about their behavior and why it was not okay. It is important to set boundaries. The goal is to teach the child proper behavior and not make things worse.

6. Prepare

A parent can tell that at a certain age their child is going to have an attitude and will be disrespectful. This happens usually when a child reaches adolescence.

 

When this time is coming up or if a parent begins to experience some of the rude behavior from the child they need to develop a plan.

 

They should not wait until the heat of the moment to try to figure out what to do. A parent needs to think about the effective consequences they are going to set and how to follow through with them.

 

If they anticipate some of the behaviors and work out a plan they are less likely to engage in the power struggle. If the behavior happened once there is a good chance that it is going to happen again.

 

A parent will plan out how they are going to respond to it. They will think about the limits they will set and the consequences that will be enforced.

 

The parent needs this plan so they can walk away from the behavior. They do not have to engage in the fight. They need to walk away so this behavior stops.

7. Be a Leader for the Child

The job of a parent is not always going to be easy. The parent will not always be liked and they will have to make some tough choices.

 

A parent is not a friend. A parent is there to show the child right from wrong and teach them to become independent and productive adults.

 

Parents play many roles in the life of their children. They are caregivers, teachers, and coaches. The parent needs to be the one to teach their child how to handle anger and frustration.

 

They will need to give the child the skills needed to work out their problems without blowing up and becoming disrespectful. If the child does not learn when they are young it will be much more difficult to learn as adults.

 

The parent needs to teach a child to behave properly and in some cases, they need to lead by example. The parents need to encourage the child when they do the right thing and handle the situation properly.

 

They will also need to set limits when the child does something they should not. For some parents that is the hardest part but it is necessary.

 

The parents need to follow these things so they can become effective at raising their child. They need to teach the child the skills needed to be functioning adults and how to be responsible for their actions.

Additional Tips

When dealing with a disrespectful child in public do not try to engage and correct them right there. It will cause the child to become embarrassed and this will make the behavior worse.

 

Parents should ignore as much of the behavior as they can and they may have to leave the public setting. The parent should then talk to the child about the behavior in private once everyone is calm.

It does take time to make some behavior changes. Just like disrespectful behavior, the improved behavior will not happen overnight. The parent will need to keep at it. The best thing they can do is to be consistent.

 

Once the child can expect the reaction of the parent and will know they will not respond in an argument things will begin to change. Once limits are set things will begin to change too.

 

The child may have to lose a phone or a toy a few times to realize the parents are serious and behavioral changes will begin to be made.

The parent is the one in control. If they argue and yell back at the child they will lose control. The child will get the reaction they are looking for and will take over the control the parents are supposed to have.

Raising a child is not going to be an easy task. Even good children have times when they become angry and get disrespectful. The role of the parent is to teach the child how to handle this anger so they can function and not get into trouble.

 

Parents need to model respectful behavior and set limits for the child. They need to prepare for the behavior and develop a plan so they can teach the child right from wrong.

 

Once the child does not get the angry reaction from the parent the disrespectful behavior will decrease and they will use some of the new skills they learned to handle anger.